Pay them half

This account deals with a typical encounter I have had with the living God in addressing a financial situation pertaining to accommodation and sustenance, whilst living in Sea Point, Cape Town, during the mid-1990s.

      

Prior to moving to Sea Point, I had been renting a room (on a weekly basis) at The Lennox, then still a reasonably appointed residential establishment in Gardens, Cape Town.  I was asked to vacate it at months end as it had been pre-booked by cyclists partaking in the annual Cape Argus Pick n Pay Cycle Race.

As still is the case today, I had been walking out my preordained destiny in Jesus, going to where He was leading, resolving everything in Him, step by step, as I went along.^[1]

However, as is perhaps still the case, I was reluctant to commit myself to long-term fixed accommodation, especially to a protracted lease agreement.  I was totally reliant on God for all my accommodation, food, and clothes, which He had faithfully provided[2], albeit always at the very last minute.  Living like this is exhilarating but can also be nerve-wracking, as one has to wait to see how and when He chooses to provide.  Moreover, there always is the possibility that He might choose, for very valid reasons of His own, not to provide.^[3]  Safeguarding me against such an embarrassing financial eventuality always seems to cause me to irrationally want to hedge my bets.  Such reasoning, ultimately is, of course, fallacious and perhaps still, to some extent, needs to be worked out of me in my walk with him.^[4]  (Unfortunately the lost, but especially believers, often scrutinizes one’s every move/step, to watch to see if one comes undone.  If this happens, it seemingly will validate their own theories or interpretation of Scripture, as apposed to what one is practically walking/working out in Him.)

Whilst seeking God’s face for alternative accommodation, a sister-in-the-Lord one day took me to a residential hotel located in Kei Apple road, Sea Point (not far from where she herself lived), then known as The King David Hotel (previously also known, I was recently told by someone who knew the area well, as The Queens Hotel). 

By God’s grace, I was able to book a room for R700.00 per month (obviously at a more beneficial rate than on a daily, weekly or bi-weekly basis) providing some form of stability, albeit only briefly.^[5]

Having recently returned to Cape Town,^[6] I looked up the location of the hotel to determine if it still exists.  Where it once stood is now a new development, know as Planet Africa  (However, in case you are interested, it used to be situated within a few minutes’ walking distance from the Checkers Supermarket, located at the corner of Regent street and St Andrews road.)

Planet Africa (ex-King David Hotel
Sea Point, South Africa)

View from King David Hotel
(to local Checkers supermarket)

Google aerial view of above images

Although the hotel offered pre-paid restaurant meals to residents wanting to use such facilities, I chose not to, instead daily visiting the local supermarket for my daily sustenance.

Also staying at the hotel at the time was Dino, a brother-in-the-Lord (of Italian extraction).  By occupation he was a chef who had worked in a guesthouse in the Eastern Transvaal.  After a serious car accident, he moved to Cape Town, hoping to utilise the compensation received (from a personal injury insurance settlement), to set up a coffee shop or similar establishment, perhaps even providing light meals for potential customers.

Having previously been in business for my own account, I assisted him in working through his limited options, mostly trying to prevent him from squandering his cash and by him avoiding costly, irreversible financial mistakes, such as locating it in the wrong area, entering into unfavourable lease arrangements, superfluous or costly expenditure on the wrong items, etc.^[7]  He almost daily came to see me to assist him in exploring his options and we got to know each other reasonably well as a result.

Despite my own arrangement, I knew that, at some point, in the near future, I was going to run out of cash, a prospect too frightening to contemplate for most people.  At least I had the temporary “security” of a pre-paid room for a month in advance, providing me with some breathing space—but it was not going to last long, and so, as this day approached, with a little more than R 700.00 to cover my existence, I began seeking God’s face for solutions.

Whilst in prayer one day, He suddenly responded by saying, “Pay them half.”  “I cannot do so Lord,” I protested, “there will be a rate amendment (as if He was oblivious to it).”  My mindless riposte remained unanswered.  In obedience, I eventually went to the receptionist on duty, saying, “I do not know for how long I will be staying with you.  Can I pay you R350.00 in the meantime?”  “I am not sure,” she said.  “When I see the manager again I will ask him and get back to you.”  I nonetheless insisted paying her the R350.00 (as He had instructed), which she accepted, and for which I received a receipt.

When over the next few days no one responded to my request, I approached the manager concerning my situation.  He informed me that the hotel was owned by a Jewish landlord.  The premises had been leased to a Swiss citizen, living in Constantia, operating it as a hotel.  The lease expired at the end of that month but the landlord decided not to renew it.  Instead, he planned auctioning the property.  His intentions totally surprised the lessee, potentially leaving him without his primary source of income.  His staff likewise faced a dilemma, not sure what was going to unfold, with them all ultimately risking loosing the “security” of their jobs.  “As far as I am concerned,” he said, “you can stay on for as long as you like, at no extra cost, until we all have to leave.”

The news quickly spread, especially to the residential tenants, some having lived there for years.  Everyone was forced to hastily try and secure alternative accommodation.

With the upcoming Cape Argus Pick n Pay Cycling event, this proved to be almost impossible, as the cyclists have also pre-booked virtually all available residential accommodation in the area.  People were bewildered, left in an extremely vulnerable situation.  Some even approached a local radio station to air their discontent, frustration and anger—but all to no avail.

Dino joined the mad rush to find new accommodation and would check in with me daily, informing me about the prospects he had unearthed.  He was totally oblivious of my circumstances, but made it clear he was trying to find a place “for us both” to stay.  I assume he presumed I could or would pay half the rent.  Given what I had already shared above, I could not commit myself to such an arrangement, but he forged ahead nonetheless, on behalf of us both.

Having become accustomed to seeking God’s Face on everything in life, I once again turned to Him for resolution.^[8]  “Lord, what must I do?”  I kept on asking—anticipating a response.

Everyone was doing everything possible to find a place to stay.  I did not.  Instead, I awaited God’s response in the solitude of my room.

Then one day, during all this uncertainty, a hotel staff member knocked on my door, “There’s a phone call for you,” she said, informing me to take it (on what seemed to be a communal line) near the staircase on my floor.  On the phone was an unredeemed, retired coloured^[9] schoolteacher whom I had met whilst living in Jerusalem.  (She was on holiday there at the time.)  Having witnessed to her in Israel, I gave her the telephone number of a believer in Johannesburg to contact, when visiting her daughter (who lived and worked there), should she feel inclined to do so.

Before I returned from Israel, she somehow obtained my mother’s phone number from someone and tried to reach me at her retirement home in Vanderbijlpark, leaving a message for me to contact her upon my return (if I ever did).  When I arrived back in South Africa I tried to contact her at the number provided, but learnt she had left, this time for Zambia.  That was the last time I thought I would ever hear from her, but here she now was on the line, this time having heard from another South African (who had also visited Israel at the same time) that I was now living in Cape Town, the city where they both resided.

She suggested we meet for tea at an outdoor restaurant located at the botanical gardens, off the city centre, which we did, soon thereafter.  It was a casual meeting without any agenda or set purpose.  She was inquisitive about my plans.  I said I was between things (not knowing what God had in mind), but that I would soon (given the aforesaid) move, although not sure where to yet.  We parted company and again I truly thought I would never see or hear from her again.

Edna and I had nothing in common.  Our backgrounds differed radically and so did our outlook on life, interests and activities.  Nevertheless, a few days later, she phoned again—this time suggesting that I come and stay with her.  She even suggested Dino do likewise.  I took this as coming from the Lord (Dino had a different view), and soon moved to Grassy Park, a predominantly coloured area, in which she resided.

The flatlet, adjoining her home, consisted of two bedrooms (the one abutting the other), a bathroom and kitchen.  It was freely available to me, for as long as I wanted to stay there.  Although relatively far away from everything, it was secluded, well appointed and comfortable.[10]  Whilst Edna was going about her daily business, most days going off somewhere, I predominantly spent my time in Scripture and simply being with Him.

One day as I sat at the desk in the spare bedroom, studying (the Person of) the Holy Spirit, as revealed in Scripture (particularly in Acts 4), I suddenly heard Him say, “Go look at your passport.”

I got up from my chair and retrieved my passport from my suitcase.  As I opened it, I noticed that it was expiring during that particular week.  When Dino came to visit, and learnt what God had told me, he insisted that we immediately drive to Home Affairs (located) in Wynberg (if my memory serves me correctly) to have it renewed, and so we did.

Not long thereafter God moved me thousands of miles away—his time to Zambia, for which I needed a renewed passport!

I could have solved all of the aforesaid intellectually, by using my God-given mental faculty—and that, I can assure you, is what most Christians would have urged/advised  me to do based on their understanding of God’s word, leaving only that for which they had no answers to Him.

I deliberately chose not to do so.

Among others, Scripture in Proverbs declares, “Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding; ⁶  in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct your paths.”^[11]

How true this proved to be the case in the aforementioned incident.

I was not (and no longer am) part of the maelstrom of everyday events in a godless world, primarily obsessed with and serving itself.[12]  I was (and still am) serving Him, walking out my destiny in Him[13], as best I know how, with Him directing my paths superlatively in the midst of untold greed, strive and turmoil—as the aforementioned incident attests.

The manner in which He so graciously dealt with me may not be the way you would have handled it.  So let me ask you this: How would you have resolved my situation and how are you practically resolving the daily issues of your life? 

Do you perhaps still act as if you are wiser than Him, resolving issues, (hopefully/presumably) to your advantage, as you see fit—or do you truly submit to Him, viewing Him as the source of all life, serving His purposes, on His terms?

In my experience, it is best to line up with the revelation of Him; to die completely to self and to find life in Him alone^[14] on His terms; as He directs,[15] serving and loving “ the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your mind, and with all your strength.”^[16]

We can delude ourselves, but He cannot be fooled.  He knows who His servants truly are, and those pretending to be (or even those wanting to do “something” for Him), and He deals with them both accordingly.

The daily reality of it will be revealed in whether one clearly encounters the living God (or not) as we grapple (or not) with the issues of life flowing out of His Being. 

This is not an optional process and the consequences, whether one realises/appreciate it or not, are eternal.

Peter wrote, “Grace and peace be multiplied to you in the knowledge of God and of Jesus our Lord, ³ as His divine power has given to us all things that pertain to life and godliness, through the knowledge of Him who called us by glory and virtue, ⁴ by which have been given to us exceedingly great and precious promises, that through these you may be partakers of the divine nature, having escaped the corruption that is in the world through lust.”^[17]

May He bless you abundantly in encountering Him as you diligently seek His word and Face with all your might for a clearer understanding of Him and His ways.

Blessed be His Name forevermore!

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[1] In 1 Corinthians 16.6-8 we see glimpses of the same processes in Paul’s life (even though his calling was already broadly defined as can be clearly seen in passages, such as, for example, Acts 9 and 22).

[2] See Matthew 6.24-34

[3] Proverbs 9.11-12 says, “My son, do not despise the chastening of the Lord, nor detest His correction; for whom the Lord loves He corrects, just as a father the son [in whom] he delights.”

[4] I am doing far better with the fear (or anxiousness) of Him not providing.  This was something I needed to overcome.  God sometimes allow us to come horribly undone—but allows this always for our own benefit and it usually occurs when He needs to deal with something we need to come to terms with doctrinally, relating to misconceptions, etc He wants corrected.  In this respect, Paul says, in 1 Cor 15.31, “I die daily,” i.e. there are aspects of our lives that still need to die, in subjugation, to His Lordship.  In working out our destiny, we are placed in hardship, sometimes totally beyond our control to learn to no longer trust in self, but totally in God, as 2 Cor 1.8-11, for example, teaches.

[5] In today’s terms this is equivalent of roughly R 8,662.82, assuming a growth rate of 15% over that period or  $971.17 pm (converted at R8.92/$1.00 in September 2012)

[6] On 14 August 2012

[7] Thus functioning in the gift of helps, as found in 1 Cor 12.28: “Now you are the body of Christ, and members individually. 28 And God has appointed these in the church: first apostles, second prophets, third teachers, after that miracles, then gifts of healings, helps, administrations, varieties of tongues.” (My emphasis)

[8] “Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; ^7 and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus,”  (Phil 2.6-7) with “…in Him we live and move and have our being …” (Ac 17.28)

[9] I do not like to refer to people by their race, as it is irrelevant, but this places it in the South African context of the time.

[10] Staying here, you may want to know where I got cash from to sustain myself.  I honestly cannot even remember.  I have long ago taken another text to mind and ceased wondering where my next meal was going to come from, “If then you were raised with Christ, seek those things which are above, where Christ is, sitting at the right hand of God. 2 Set your mind on things above, not on things on the earth. 3 For you died, and your life is hidden with Christ in God.”  (Col 3.1-3)

^[11]The New King James Version . 1996, c1982 (electronic ed.) (Pr 3:5). Nashville: Thomas Nelson.

[12] “We know that we are of God, and the whole world lies under the sway of the wicked one,” (1 Jn 5.19) with “And you [He made alive,] who were dead in trespasses and sins, ² in which you once walked according to the course of this world, according to the prince of the power of the air [Satan], the spirit who now works in the sons of disobedience, ³ among whom also we all once conducted ourselves in the lusts of our flesh, fulfilling the desires of the flesh and of the mind, and were by nature children of wrath, just as the others,” (Ep 2.2-3) with “Do not love the world or the things in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him. ¹⁶ For all that is in the world—the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life—is not of the Father but is of the world. ¹⁷ And the world is passing away, and the lust of it; but he who does the will of God abides forever.” (1 Jn 2.15-17)

[13] “For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand that we should walk in them.”  (Ep 2.10)

[14] “…if One died for all, then all died; ^15 and He died for all, that those who live should live no longer for themselves, but for Him who died for them and rose again.”  (2 Co 5.14-15)

[15] “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.”  (Ro 8.28, NIV)

^[16]The New King James Version . 1996, c1982 (electronic ed.) (Mk 12:30). Nashville: Thomas Nelson.

^[17]The New King James Version . 1996, c1982 (electronic ed.) (2 Pe 1:2). Nashville: Thomas Nelson.

$ 400

Although a lost world looks at Christianity as a predominantly unappealing and impractical belief-system, adhered to by some members of society, Christians themselves sometimes, unfortunately,[1] hold vastly differing Scriptural viewpoints.

At times, as individual believers work out these viewpoints, there is a convergence of lives and an encounter with the living God.  This is what happened to four of us living in Jerusalem in the early 90s.

It concerned three women: a Finn, a Swede and a South African (the latter two of Jewish extraction, all of whom had accepted Yeshua as their Saviour) and lastly me, a South African male.  We were all at various levels of Scriptural insight and maturity, but wholeheartedly committed to the Lord.

To some believers Christianity is no more than a moral code, a value system, a philosophy, or, at best, a theology, explaining their beliefs and approach to life.  This was not the case with the first two women.  They were truly committed to the Lord, knowing Him as the source of all life, and were led by Him to reside, for a period, in Jerusalem.

I cannot speak regarding what they were working out in Him, but I had the utmost respect for especially the aforementioned Finn, who had an astonishingly intimate walk with Him, and whom, of the three, I got to know best.  Personally, I came to Israel because I have heard Him, on one chilly Friday afternoon speaking the following words, “Go to Israel.  That is where I walked and taught.”  At the time, although searching for answers anew as a backslidden businessman, I had no idea why He wanted me to go to Israel, but nonetheless packed up, lock stock and barrel, and left in obedience.

I first met the Finn, at a bible study conducted in the rented apartment of an American, Dr. Harold Kastner,[2] in Gi’vat Shapira (or French Hill).  She, in turn, brought the Swede, with whom she shared an apartment in Rahavia (a suburb of Jerusalem, situated opposite the Israeli Knesset or Parliament).  I initially got to know them both as we stood chatting opposite Harold’s apartment, waiting for a bus to our respective abodes.  The South African I met whilst living in a hostel in the Old City of Jerusalem.  She borrowed my laptop to type correspondence needing urgently to be dispatched to South Africa.[3]  I did not know her at all really, but it was clear she was struggling and unwilling, perhaps because of it, to open up to strangers.  At the time, I also lived in the Old City (amongst two nuns) at the Sisters of the Rosary (opposite the Latin Patriarch).

What I did not know was that the South African has previously shared the apartment with the Finn and Swede, and thus all four our paths, had at some point, intertwined.

When Harold and his wife went overseas temporarily to minister, an older America believer, from Boise, Idaho in the United States, who had also attended Harold’s meetings, suggested a few of us continue meeting at her place,  until they return.

The first time we did so the Swede wanted us to pray about something.  When I learnt it concerned money, I said a quick prayer, asking the Lord to address the need.  Having been in business in Johannesburg, first in the corporate world and later for my own account, having recently restored my situation with the Lord, I still felt uncomfortable praying about monetary issues.  To me it was easier to simply devise a plan to make as much as needed.  (I have since adopted a completely different stance; often praying about it—as I also began working out my own destiny in Him and became totally financially dependant on Him.[4])

Months later, as I visited the Finn at her Rahavia apartment one day, the Swede joined us, having returned from running errands.  She wanted us to urgently pray about something.  “Is it the same problem we prayed about previously?”  I wanted to know.  It was.

When I left South Africa for Israel, the maximum amount I could then take out the country, because of the severe foreign exchange restrictions brought about by the governments apartheid policies, was R 30,000.00 (and then via one of my businesses!).  I knew it was not going to last long.  As the amount began to dwindle, I not only got concerned, I instinctively began exploring Israeli business opportunities.

Then, during this process, I read the following text one day:  “No one can serve two masters; for either he will hate the one and love the other, or else he will be loyal to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve God and mammon [meaning riches in Aramaic, but personified here].  ^25 “Therefore I say to you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink; nor about your body, what you will put on. Is not life more than food and the body more than clothing? ^26 Look at the birds of the air, for they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns; yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? ^27 Which of you by worrying can add one cubit to his stature?  ^28 “So why do you worry about clothing? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin; ^29 and yet I say to you that even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these. ^30 Now if God so clothes the grass of the field, which today is, and tomorrow is thrown into the oven, [will] He not much more [clothe] you, O you of little faith?  ^31 “Therefore do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ ^32 For after all these things the Gentiles seek. For your heavenly Father knows that you need all these things. ^33 But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you.  ^34 Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about its own things. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.” ^[5] (Annotation and emphasis mine)

I had been raised to be diligent, to study and work hard, to do more than what was expected of me.  This, I was told, would bring me success in life.  Everything I was told; what I had learnt scholastically, in tertiary institutions, empirically, and in business (from the advice given by mentors, etc. and practically) and by observing and studying the actions of extremely successful people the world over—none of it—corresponds with Jesus’ words above.

Instead, He directs us to consider how God sustains life in His created order via the lives of birds and what appears to be ‘naturally’ growing in the field.  Although loving being out in nature, it invariable served as an escape from the pressures of live.  I have never truly observed it, for its own sake, but heeding Jesus’ words, I began noticing what He intended conveying.  One particularly beautiful tree, on my way to the King of Kings assembly (opposite the King David Hotel in Jerusalem), I soon concluded, was more perfectly in God’s will than I will ever be.  There it stood in all its glory, extremely pleasing to the eye.  It did not move an inch to sustain itself.  All the nourishment from the soil and rain He provided—and unless He did so, it would die.  It was a great lesson.

Jesus said, “… seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you.”  I had no idea what He truly meant by it, but instinctively knew I was somehow going to be taught by Him in this respect in the days ahead.

I considered myself fortunate, ‘successful’ in just about everything I have ever tackled in life.  Although not a natural businessman, every three months or so, I generated the kind of profits most people were hoping to make in a lifetime.  Nevertheless, despite all of this, I knew I did not have the answers to a lot of questions, and it deeply troubled me.  (That in itself, let me assure you, is a blessing.  Those who self assuredly plod along, believing they have all the answers to life, neatly packaged, are more often than not living in deception.)  Seeking answers, I began reading the Scriptures even more ferociously.

Whilst still living in South Africa, travelling home from bird watching one Sunday afternoon, I listened to the Scriptures on the tape player in my car.  Most of it, I concluded, was not relevant to my situation.  Then these words hit me like a sledgehammer, “and He died for all, that those who live should live no longer for themselves, but for Him who died for them and rose again.”^[6] (Emphasis mine)  Astonishingly it addressed my problem in a nutshell—in a single verse of Scripture!  I was driven to determine my own fate in life, wanting to be in control of my own destiny.  This simple verse stated the exact opposite!

When I got home, I pondered its meaning.  “Surely, it cannot practically mean taking my hands off my own life,” I reasoned.  “It will fall apart.  Guaranteed,” I assured myself.  And yet, not long thereafter, this is precisely what I did.

I understood and became skilful at managing business risks.  In fact, I thrived on it, with the odds always overwhelmingly in my favour, before embarking on any new venture—but, at the time, in taking what I considered to be an extremely radical decision, it felt as if I was about to jump off a steep, never ending cliff.  There was no way in which I could possibly determine, control or influence the course or outcome of this decision.  It felt as if no one has ever taken such a drastic step.

I tried bargaining with God, “I will not live for myself anymore; I will take the leap, but please catch me before I come totally unstuck, falling myself to smithereens.”  Completely vulnerable, I nonetheless ignorantly acted as if I was the initiator of the terms of the “deal.”  (Needless to say, He did not respond, and at times in my walk with Him since, He has deliberately (and rightly so) removed the safety net and, as a result, taught me invaluable lessons as I came unstuck, which I otherwise never could or would have learnt.[7])

So here I was, living in Israel, at the point where I had run out of money myself, sitting opposite two women, being asked to pray about someone else’s money problems.  Apart from the same problem having been raised only a few weeks ago, I had never been in this situation before and was totally unaccustomed to and uncomfortable with it.

A few days prior to this request, I was going through my own monetary struggles.  I was wondering if God would take care of me financially since I was now pursuing Him, no longer serving mammon.  Although not Catholic, I have rented a room at the Sisters of the Rosary.  My rent was overdue and I was unable to meet my commitments.  I hung in with God as long as I could, trying to figure out how the aforementioned passage in Matthew 6, especially verse 33, applied to my situation/dilemma.  In the end, I buckled and contacted South Africa, requesting someone to send me $1000.00 of my own money.

Wanting to get to know the Finn better, I asked her to travel with me to a hotel in Tel Aviv where I had arranged to collect it from Cathy Futterman’s (an ex-girlfriend’s) sister, who was in Israel for medical treatment.  I had deliberately restricted the amount requested, as I felt I still needed to push the envelope with God, needing to come to grips with many textual references dealing with His assured provision.

The morning before I visited the Finn and Swede, I added up the remaining balance (after having incurred travelling expenditure and other costs) and clipped it into two sets of $400.00 notes, saying to myself, “After I having paid the amount owed the Sisters of the Rosary, this is all I have to live on.”  Thinking, “I have to be careful how I spend it.  It will have to take care of a roof over my head somewhere and all my other needs.”  (How dumb can one be and how false this sense of security?  This, clearly, also was not going to last long, merely delaying the inevitable.)

So here we were now praying for someone else’s financial needs.  She felt it needed to be resolved that same day.  The Finn advised her on something, I felt led to tell her not worry about it being resolved that day specifically, and said so.  She felt the same and so, agreeing, we set off for the kitchen for a cup of coffee.

As we stood in conversation, with my hands tucked into my Levi’s (my right hand clutching the two bundles of notes), I suddenly heard Him saying to me, saying, “Give her the money.”  I was dumbfounded.  I have lived without cash for a while and I had just received the amount I was ‘hanging’ onto.  Since collecting it, I had not even bought a cold drink and now I was being told to give it all away.

I immediately excused myself, made a u-turn and walked out of the tiny kitchen, turned left into the passage and then right into the Swede’s bedroom and, via it, walked out onto the balcony (it was the only way I could get there) and looked out over the houses lining the beautiful slopes of Rehavia.

“How much do you want me to leave Lord,” I asked.  “You made two plies of notes this morning, didn’t you?”  He said.  (Somehow, it surprised me that He had noticed, as if He was not omnipresent.)  “Yes Lord,” I answered.  “Leave the one pile here and pay your rent with the other,” He said.  “I would be penniless, yet again,” I thought and made another u-turn, heading back through the bedroom towards the kitchen, wondering where I should “leave” the money.

I noticed a phone on Ingrid’s bedside table and tucked the one pile of notes under it.  It barely stuck out but was sufficiently visible to be noticed and walked into the kitchen.

“I’ve got to leave,” I said.  “I owe the Sisters of the Rosary rent and I am going to pay them right away.”  The Finn decided to accompany me and so we set off together.

That, as far as I was concerned, settled the issue.

Months later, however, I again visited my sisters-in-the-Lord in Rehavia.  The Swede wanted to know if I had left the $ 400.00 under the phone.  I tried skirting the issue.  “No, it is important,” she countered, “I want to tell the person who left the money what had happened.”  Curious, I acknowledged giving them the cash.

She told me they provided accommodation to our Jewish sister-in-the-Lord (whom I had met staying in the Old City of Jerusalem).  Attempting arranging a money transfer from South Africa, she ran up an enormous unpaid phone bill of $ 400.00 (and a few cents), which my sisters-in-the-Lord were unable to settle.  They themselves trusted God completely for their financial needs.  In fact, their entire apartment, everything in it (furniture, cutlery, crockery and linen, and everything else in it, in addition to their daily sustenance) He had divinely provided and continued doing so.  In receipt of the much-needed cash, they searched through their clothing (of all things) for the small change needed to settle the full account with the telephone company and found the exact amount needed.

This is so like our God.  He settles issues to the “T” (probably a South African saying, meaning precisely).  I have experienced His exacting provision on countless occasions since.  I suspect He does so leaving no doubt in the mind of the recipient whatsoever that it is His provision, in the manner He deemed best.

For a variety of reasons (apart from having to resolve my own issues), I desperately wanted to hear His wonderful voice.  The feedback from my sister-in-the-Lord was very encouraging.  It was very pleasing to learn I had heard Him correctly—even if it seemed to be to my own detriment, which of course it was not.[8]  If I had it, and was asked by Him to do so, I would have left them a million dollars.

Learning to hear His voice and obeying Him is extremely important.  If one is raised up to function as a prophet in His kingdom, to the body of Christ (or to whomever He wishes to speak), this is, for example, exactly the sort of thing situation one will be exposed to in Him.

Unbeknown to me at the time, all of it served as a wonderful learning curve, not only of Scriptural realities, but also in the ways of our God.  All of it eventually leading to me becoming more proficient in my function and role in the temple of our God—where He reigns supremely—embarking on the road to the fulfilment of my own preordained role in the body of Christ.

The ways of our God are truly beyond searching out.

If one is to encounter the living God, one has to die to self.  One has to find life in His Being and on His terms.  Unless one does so, one will never come to grips with the reality of Scripture and who He truly is—the Source of all the issues of life flowing from His Person.

You also will encounter the living God as you seek His face at the exclusion of all else—and may He richly bless you as you do so!

---

[1] On occasion, I have Christians who disagree with me theologically, brush it off with comments, such as, “It is all right.  I do not hold it against you,” but in reality they do.  This approach is not only a cop-out but contradicts what Scripture clearly teaches. We are called to be of the same mind according to according to 1 Corinthians 1.10; 2 Corinthians 13.11; Philippians  1.27, 3.16, 4.2; 1 Pe 4.1, etc..

[2] A remarkable servant of God, who had earned a doctorate in Cost and Management Accounting, who, at one point, was responsible for the tertiary educational funding needs of the State of Florida.  Apparently, this involved liaising with Washington Senators, etc.  The Lord has appeared to him, handing him seven scrolls, unsealing the first, on which were written what had been assigned to his life.  At the time I met him, he was systematically working out what had been written on this scroll in God’s time and way.

[3] This was in the early 90s before the internet was the primary means of international correspondence.

[4] “For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand that we should walk in them,” with “If then you were raised with Christ, seek those things which are above, where Christ is, sitting at the right hand of God. ^2 Set your mind on things above, not on things on the earth. ^3 For you died, and your life is hidden with Christ in God.”^[4]

^[5]The New King James Version . 1996, c1982 (electronic ed.) (Mt 6:24). Nashville: Thomas Nelson.

^[6]The New King James Version . 1996, c1982 (electronic ed.) (2 Co 5:15). Nashville: Thomas Nelson.

[7] “And we know that in all things God works for the good [even if it does not seem so] of those who [1] love him, who [2] have been called according to his purpose.”^[7] (Annotation and emphasis mine.)   To many Jesus’ death, for example, solved their self-serving agenda’s.  To other’s it seemed a total disaster.  Personally, privately, He was publicly working out His own destiny in God, reconciling the world to Himself through His obedient and glorious Servant.

[8] Romans 8.28 says, “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.^[8]

To be loved

Late one summer’s afternoon, during 2007, living in Muizenberg (South Africa), I decided to wander from Muizenberg, past a pleasant tidal pool at St James, towards Kalk Bay, and back, along a wonderful walkway skirting False Bay, to exercise a bit, clear my thoughts and to see what the ocean has brought to shore.

Muizenberg
 (where author lived)
(Please click on images to enlarge}

Muizenberg - Kalk Bay map

St James tidal pool, mountainside view

Muizenberg - Kalk Bay
(Google Earth image),
 with Bailey's  Cottage
 (visible where walkway turns more north.)

Muizenberg - St James walkway

Kalk Bay harbour

As I approached the walkway, I noticed a young “coloured”[1] couple in conversation.  They were in disagreement about something.  It turned out he too wanted to get some exercise, by jogging along the same pathway.  She simply wanted to sit on a bench somewhere along the way, facing the ocean, romantically soak in the beauty of it all.  In passing, I casually commented to the man to accede to her wishes and to simply appreciate it all along with her (rather then making a production of their time away from the grind of daily life).

Instead of telling me to mind my own business, they somehow, of their own volition,  joined me on my daily stroll and, as it is my custom when meeting strangers, we soon got talking about what consumes my life: Him and his kingdom.  The man wanted to know if I was a pastor.  If anything, I said, my role was more prophetic.

He then wanted to know if they were meant to be together, in a marital relationship.  It quickly became apparent to me that she was keener to be in a permanent, more lasting relationship than he intended and may well have been “pressurizing” him, ever so subtly, towards this end.  He clearly had his doubts about it all.

It was also evident that, although regularly attending church, neither of their lives was right with Him, i.e. He was not truly their first priority.  This was more apparent concerning the young man, as is unfortunately nowadays so often the case.

They both worked for the same commercial enterprise, but she had recently been made redundant when their organization decided to scale back.

In the Spirit, I “knew” they were not meant for one another, but did not feel led to express anything to them collectively or individually.  However, in sharing our need to resolve everything, including marriage and one’s destiny or calling, in Him, she, in turn, indicated that she had years previously been a “missionary”[2] to Russia.  When asked the reason for her return, she cited monetary restrictions.  I expressed the view that I do not believe this to be sufficient reason to terminate or deviate from what He had assigned to one’s life; that one needs to pursue one’s calling in Him regardless, trusting Him to resolve all obstacles, including (perhaps even especially) monetary considerations.[3]

On our walk back to Muizenberg, at the slight incline near the historical Bailey’s Cottage[4] landmark (towards the end of our walk), He suddenly spoke to me.

“Tell her that I love her,” He said

Bailey's Cottage
(Google Earth image)

Bailey's Cottage
(view from Muizenberg)
God spoke to us where person is walking to the right of it

A few years prior to this account, He had uttered those exact same words to me concerning a well-known prophet (with a worldwide ministry), who, at the time, was a member of the Hatfield Christian Church ministerial team, in Pretoria, South Africa.

I did not know him at all, but was invited by a Dutch Reformed minister’s wife to attend a daylong meeting at which he was to minister.  One of the ladies from her assembly, in Vanderbijlpark, South Africa, had been impressed by his ministry, and consequently invited him to address a group of us, presumably mostly believers, on a Saturday morning at the local golf club.  I was told beforehand that he functioned in the office of a prophet: something not truly recognized by this particular lady’s denomination.[5]

When I met him, I deliberately asked him if he was a prophet.[6]  “Yes,” he said, but probably being mindful of the audience he was about to address, added, “But I am also a Pastor.”

As I sat down, waiting for the meeting to commence, I asked[7] the Lord to give me a specific “word” for this man (who had brought two ladies along with him to assist him ministerially).

“Tell him that I love Him,” He said.

“Lord, You love everyone,” I countered, “This is not specific enough.  He will never believe this to be a personal word coming from You.”  He remained silent.  I consequently promptly discounted the idea as being inconsequential.

After breaking for early morning tea, during the second session, he related how he used to suffer from a psychological condition generally referred to as a panic attack.  Gripped by illogical fear, it totally immobilised him—to the extent that he was unable to even extricate himself from a chair to go to the shops to purchase something.  He shared how he had through prayer, or in endless conversation with Him, struggled and eventually succeeded in freeing himself from its devastating stranglehold; its overwhelming, debilitating bondage.

“Nothing in the world is more important to me than God telling me that He loves me,” he unexpectedly said.  Words I will never forget!  I was stunned.

Ashamedly, I still do not know anything about panic attacks, spiritually or otherwise, but my gut says it has to have something to do with extremely low self-esteem; possibly feeling unloved, all of which had to have been demonically induced.  I suspect his desire to hear God expressing His love for him had been crucial in him being delivered from Satan’s incapacitating lies, and consequently continue to be of paramount importance.

Believers so easily confess Jesus’ words, “For where two or three are gathered together in My name, I am there in the midst of them,”^[8] often without being convinced or truly assured that He is in fact present, especially in the absence of any spiritual manifestation(s).  Given the aforesaid, I had no doubt whatsoever, He was present all right—exactly as He said would be the case.

The word God had given me was one-hundred percent accurate, highly relevant and specific to this man’s life.  I was dumbfounded, deeply regretting not having implicitly trusted what He had conveyed to me.  I rued being disobedient, not expressing His living word to His servant—prior to me discovering what it meant to him.  I also knew that even if I belatedly shared what He had told me—this man was not going to believe me.  God’s soul was left unexpressed.[9]  I had failed functioning effectively as His mouthpiece, as prophets should.  My ratiocinations proved to be disastrous.

When we eventually broke for lunch, I asked to speak to him.  I told him what I had shared with you in the preceding paragraphs.  He listened attentively but did not truly accept it as coming from God, as expected.  Throughout the rest of the day, I became aware that he occasionally thoughtfully stared at me, as if he wanted to believe what I had shared, but a lingering sense of scepticism seemed to prevail.

I blew it big time and seriously regretted it.

Here I now was, years later, walking along a walkway with two total strangers, having heard the exact same words concerning one of them.  For a few seconds I recalled and reflected on what had transpired in the past.

On extremely rare occasions will I say to people “God has told me to tell you … (whatever it is He has told me).”  I much prefer delivering His word more indirectly by, say, asking a question.  However, this time I boldly stated, “God has, just now, told me to tell you that He loves you.”

Her reaction truly surprised me.

Whilst maintaining a steady gait, she absentmindedly continued staring at the walkway in front of her.  I might just as well not have said anything!  The living word from God seemed to be like water running off a duck’s back.  It seemed inappropriate, misdirected, meaning nothing to her whatsoever.

I could have shrugged it off, musing to myself, “I have badly missed You this time,” and left it at that, by all accounts not having done any “serious” damage, since He truly loves us, after all, as Scripture unequivocally declares.[10]

However, no longer a novice in His ways, I was positive He had spoken.  Being a prophet, I am always curious about what He says, how He says it, who (or what) He addresses, and why.[11]

I asked her if she had recently sought His face on anything specific.  Again, she appeared to be apathetic, but I persisted in pursuing the matter, aware that He is a purposeful Being and spoke to her accordingly. 

“I have asked Him all day long if He loves me,” she eventually said.

Her response, given all of the aforesaid, astounded me.  (It should not have, but it did.)  For a few days afterward I continued pondered the unfolding of the events on that day.  I did not meet them by chance.  It had deliberately been orchestrated divinely.  Some, with merit I presume, refer to such occurrences as divine encounters.

Had I left the place where I lived a few seconds earlier (or later), or got delayed along the way, or if they did (having travelled a long distance from the exact spot where our lives intertwined) we would have missed one another and none of this would have unfolded!  Had I not initiated contact, God would not have eventually spoken to her prophetically via me.  They could have completely ignored me, viewing my casual comments as intrusive; uncalled-for.  They did not.  Instead, they chose to accommodate me.  Moreover, they were willing to listen to what I tried to convey to them concerning Him.

Even now, thinking about it all, I am particularly grateful I used the words, “God told me … to tell you …”[12] Had I not used those specific words the impact may have been far less significant.  What would have been her response if I had asked, “Have you perhaps asked God if He loves you?” or stated, “You know, God’s word declares that He truly loves you.”  She may have answered, “Yes I have, but He has not responded” or “Perhaps, but I am not so sure …” (even though Scripture does declare so unambiguously!)”

There is no doubt in my mind she theologically knew He loved her.  Nevertheless, I suspect having lost her job, being unsure whether her relationship with this man is grounded in unfailing love, suspecting there to be a possibility it may turn out not to be as she had hoped, she began questioning God’s own goodwill or intentions towards her; yes, even if He truly loves her.  There seemed little evidence of it of late, or so she might have reasoned, despite the fact that Scripture declares, “And we know that in all things [even if it does not appear to be the case] God works [not us] for the good of those who [meet the following two conditions:] [1] love him, [and] who have been called according to [2] his purpose.”^[13]  (Annotation and emphasis mine.)

Whenever God speaks prophetically to someone via my person, it probably has a far more profound effect on me than the person to whom the word is directed.  It is I who hear Him speak.  He is speaking directly to me!  It is not a casual remark made by someone of little importance or of no consequence (although it often divinely comes to one almost as such).  This is the God of the universe, the God of all creation, speaking, to me (who, in the greater scheme of things, is totally insignificant).  After all these years this, to me at least, is one of the most momentous things anyone can experience and, still as important to me, as when I first heard His voice.  He is expecting me to represent Him, to convey His Person, to another—(usually) with words from Him.

Think about what I had shared for a moment.  He could have told her in a zillion different ways that He loved her.  He could have done so directly, by means of an inner voice (and I suspect He did, but that she had possibly discounted it as having been initiated from herself, rather than God).[14]  He could have told her so audibly or through a vision, a dream, a sermon or via any other way He pleased.  So why did He do it in this manner?

Part of it, I suspect, was to make it credible, as not being wishful thinking, coming from her thoughts and/or inner desires.  It did not come via a known or concerned friend or a brother-or-sister-in-the-Lord, who might have been more familiar with her circumstances and/or needs and whose goodwill could have been misconstrued, questioned or even distrusted.

There could be innumerous other reasons, of which I could not possibly have been aware, unless I asked her (and even then I could have drawn erroneous conclusions).  Besides, one often cannot do so.  This was not a consultation.  It was a sovereign word, from a supremely Sovereign Being, who wanted to convey something important to someone, in His own time and way.[15]

Throughout the years, I have learnt that He often prophetically cuts to the chase, so to speak.  He often, succinctly addresses core issues, the crux of the matter, things sometimes deeply hidden from others, yes even to the very people He is addressing themselves.  He is dealing with it because unless it is understood and dealt with, there will be no resolution.  Better than anyone else, He knows how to put His finger on what matters most.

The accuracy thereof also never ceases to amaze me.  This is another reason it is important to single-mindedly track what is on His mind/heart.  I have often stood in front of people telling me something completely different to what He is saying, contradicting what He had told me.  One can easily discount His word under such circumstances, arguing that one has heard Him incorrectly.  But I have always found that if I probe, or even better still, receive further words from Him (as the situation unfolds) that He is always one hundred percent correct.  It will always prove to be the case when one trusts what He is saying as opposed to those He is speaking to (or providing information on).[16]

No doubt, I also was part of it.  The road to becoming a mature, trustworthy prophet is a long and winding one, where one has to learn to hear and trust Him accurately and to deliver His words faithfully, in whatever way He chooses to speak.  God will not entrust an immature or self-centred, self-serving prophet with words (be it simple and/or profound, for whomever it is meant for, say, someone with a desire for certainty [as in this case] or perhaps a world leader, whose actions [or inaction] may negatively impact the lives of billions of others as a result) if their response to Him defeats His intended purpose(s).  Prophets need to learn to be become sensitive to His Person, to the diverse and sometimes totally unexpected manner in which He speaks, in order to grow to maturity in Him and His ways trusting Him implicitly, working out their calling or destiny, or to put it even more succinctly— life itself—in Him.  He is life itself.[17]

I cannot remember much about what we talked about thereafter.  The sound of His wonderful voice made what followed seem both irrelevant and insignificant.  I gave them my contact details (in case I could be of further service to them in Him), which they eagerly accepted—but, as is so often the case, have not heard from them again.  This dumbfounds me, especially after powerfully encountering Him but, since I am usually unable to do anything about it, I have reluctantly come to accept it.  I much prefer analysing what had occurred, getting as accurate and complete a picture as possible when encountering Him, trying to eliminate, as far as is humanly possible, conjecture or assumptions[18] in order to better understand Scripture, His Person and ways.  Such fellowship is immensely enriching and rewarding.[19]

All of us knew we had encountered the Living God on that precious day.  I also, suspect, He manifested via His wonderful Holy Spirit, in the manner He did because He wanted to confirm many of the other kingdom issues we had touched upon, not only concerning our walk in Him, but on marriage, and finding and working out our destiny or calling in Him.[20]

He is a living God!  He loves[21] us immeasurably—and He loves us encountering Him thus!

---

[1] A term, which unfortunately became more pronounced under apartheid South Africa, indicating, for purposes of immoral and unethical racial classification, a separating off of people of mixed descent—in order to oppress them for personal gain.  Personally, I believe we all descent from Adam and since God shows no partiality, neither should we.  (Ac 10.34; Ac 15.8-9; Ro 2.11; Jas 2.1, etc.)

[2] Personally, I do not like the term “missionary.”  I believe one simply does what God tells one to do, as and when He unfolds, what had been preordained for our lives in Him.  (See Ep 2.10)  There are endless examples of this in Scripture: Abraham, Moses, The Israelites, Jesus, Paul, etc.

[3] Jesus said: “No one can serve two masters; for either he will hate the one and love the other, or else he will be loyal to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve God and mammon.”  ^{25 }“Therefore I say to you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink; nor about your body, what you will put on. Is not life more than food and the body more than clothing? ^26 Look at the birds of the air, for they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns; yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they?  ^27 Which of you by worrying can add one cubit to his stature? ^28 “So why do you worry about clothing? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin; ^29 and yet I say to you that even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these. ^30 Now if God so clothes the grass of the field, which today is, and tomorrow is thrown into the oven, [will He] not much more [clothe] you, O you of little faith?  ^31 “Therefore do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ ^32 For after all these things the Gentiles seek. For your heavenly Father knows that you need all these things. ^33 But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you. ^34 Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about its own things. Sufficient for the day [is] its own trouble.” (Mt 6.24-34, annotation and emphasis mine)  The Holy Spirit used this very passage to teach me the same principle I tried to convey to her.  I now have firsthand experienced of Him divinely providing for me in innumerous ways for more than 20 years!  God willing I will relate some of these on this blog.  An earlier posting Toiletry bag on this blog serves as an example of His provision.

[4] Bought  by and named after Sir Abraham "Abe" Bailey in 1909, who once owned it as a fishing cottage. Although now in a dilapidated state, it was designed by the famous architect Sir Herbert Baker's firm Baker and Massey.  In 1939 it was taken over by the military at the outbreak of World War II.  Navy personnel have used it over the years, but it has stood empty for some time.  Recently it had been leased to Peter Mdlalose, reputedly a businessman from Johannesburg, South Africa, who wants to turn it into a guesthouse.  Bailey’s descendants are in dispute with the parties to the transaction.  Bailey’s gravesite is directly above the cottage, presumably on land still owned by his descendants, on the magnificent mountain slope overlooking False Bay.  For more details regarding Abe Bailey’s “remarkable” life, please refer to the following websites: Wikipedia and abebailey.org.  I wonder if Bailey (whose approach to and views on life, although from a different era, I suspect, I once identified with),  knew Jesus as His Saviour, who said, “Do not lay up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy and where thieves break in and steal; ^20 but lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys and where thieves do not break in and steal. ^{  21} For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also…^24 “No one can serve two masters; for either he will hate the one and love the other, or else he will be loyal to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve God and mammon [an Aramaic word meaning riches, where it is personified and apposed to God].”  (Mt 6-19-24)

[5] Many of their theologians believe, despite what Scripture clearly teaches in, for example, Ep 4.11 (“And He Himself gave some [to be] apostles, some prophets, some evangelists, and some pastors and teachers, ^12 for the equipping of the saints for the work of ministry, for the edifying of the body of Christ, ^13 till we all come to the unity of the faith and of the knowledge of the Son of God, to a perfect man, to the measure of the stature of the fullness of Christ; ^14 that we should no longer be children, tossed to and fro and carried about with every wind of doctrine, by the trickery of men, in the cunning craftiness of deceitful plotting, ^15 but, speaking the truth in love, may grow up in all things into Him who is the head—Christ— ^16 from whom the whole body, joined and knit together by what every joint supplies, according to the effective working by which every part does its share, causes growth of the body for the edifying of itself in love.) that the office of the prophet (and others mentioned above) had somehow ceased to exist.  Others, with opposing views, view the functioning thereof very differently to, say, Pentecostals.

[6] The primary function of prophets according to Scripture is, I believe, for them to hear God’s voice concerning any matter He wishes to address and to verbally (and/or otherwise) express it (unless it was directed towards the prophet personally, for whatever reason).  Because they are usually more sensitive to hearing Him speak, and usually more proficient at relating what He wishes to convey, I make a point of introducing myself to them wherever possible, in case He wants to communicate something to me prophetically, as He often has done, just as expected.  In this regard, Jesus said, “He who receives a prophet in the name of a prophet shall receive a prophet’s reward.^”  (Mt 10.41)

[7] It was a “spur of the moment,” request, something I have never done before, but have often since, given this experience.

^[8]The New King James Version.  1996, c1982 (electronic ed.) (Mt 18:20). Nashville: Thomas Nelson.

[9] In case you wonder about the usage of the term “soul,” in reference to God, please refer to, among others, the following texts: Is 1.14, 42.1, Je 6.8, etc. נֶפֶשׁ in Hebrew, transliterated as nephesh, is translated as “soul” in these texts.  It also means “self; life; person; heart,” according to Vine’s (Vine, W., Unger, M. F., & White, W. (1997, c1996).  Vine's complete expository dictionary of Old and New Testament words (electronic ed.).  Nashville: Thomas Nelson)

[10] Even so, if He had not spoken to her at that time (as I had so definitively declared prophetically), I had no right whatsoever to express those words in the manner I did.  It would have seriously misrepresented God.  It would have been extremely sinful, an action in need of repentance, as it was not a specific word from Him to her at all—but one emanating from myself, or worse, Satan, God’s enemy, and/or one of his evil hosts.

[11] Scripture declares, “He made known His ways to Moses, His acts to the children of Israel.”  (Ps 103.7, emphasis mine)  The Israelites knew when God was doing something, but often without insight.  With Moses it was different.  He mostly knew what God was doing and why He was doing it, and over time became even more familiar with His ways.

[12] Similar to what Jesus said would happen to His disciples, albeit under different circumstances, “…  For it will be given to you in that hour what you should speak; ^20 for it is not you who speak, but the Spirit of your Father who speaks in you.” (Mt 10.19b)

^[13]The Holy Bible: New International Version.  1996, c1984 (electronic ed.)  (Ro 8:28).  Grand Rapids: Zondervan.  Please note this text is conditional.  The “all things” is conditional upon us truly loving him and working out our purposes in Him.  Note: He is working something out in the lives of those fulfilling these two conditions, and not us.  If one does not meet these conditions, everything does not work to one’s advantage.  In her case, if she truly met those conditions, it may very well be that this man is not God’s choice for her as marriage partner (as I “knew” to be the case.)  He was then dealing with her in relation thereto, but her failing to yield to His working this out, in order to establish what had been predetermined in Him; clearly to her advantage, could then not be accomplished owing to her unwillingness to yield to Him!  Remember: all the issues of life flows out of His Being.  He is life itself (Jn 14.2) and if we fail to comprehend it and yield to Him, we do not truly comprehend who He is (and cannot truly be blessed)!  In such situations, He will take us back to the cross for us to come to terms with what He truly accomplished there.  (Discussing this in more detail falls outside the ambit of this article/post.)

[14] The “still small voice” of God, inaudible to others, often comes to one as if it was a thought generated by oneself, only it is Him speaking.  One often hears “a voice” (or a thought) saying, “Don’t do (this or that) …,” It usually is pointing out something inappropriate or incorrect, something sinful He wants to be averted.  This is God’s voice, or one of the ways in which we hear His voice: “… and after the earthquake a fire, [but] the Lord was not in the fire; and after the fire a still small voice. ^13 So it was, when Elijah heard [it,] that he wrapped his face in his mantle and went out and stood in the entrance of the cave. Suddenly a voice [came] to him, and said, “What are you doing here, Elijah?” ^14 And he said, “I have been very zealous for the Lord God of hosts; because the children of Israel have forsaken Your covenant, torn down Your altars, and killed Your prophets with the sword. I alone am left; and they seek to take my life.”  ^15 Then the Lord said to him: “Go, return on your way to the Wilderness of Damascus; and when you arrive, anoint Hazael as king over Syria. ^16 Also you shall anoint Jehu the son of Nimshi [as] king over Israel. And Elisha the son of Shaphat of Abel Meholah you shall anoint [as] prophet in your place…” (1 Ki 19.12-16)  It is vital that we learn to distinguish this voice from our own thoughts, or worse, those likewise expressed satanically or demonically.  Unable to do so has caused untold harm to God’s servants and those to whom they speak, when He has not done so!

[15] If appropriate or where possible, I would ordinarily pursue the matter.  I have learnt invaluable lessons about His Person and/or ways (no doubt, just like Moses did) as a result.

[16] This truth will be gleaned from other encounters posted on this blog.

[17] “Jesus said to him [Thomas], “I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through Me.^” (Jn 14.6, emphasis mine)

[18] This could and often does lead to grave error.  Scripture declares, “Who can understand [his] errors? Cleanse me from secret [faults.] [i.e. perhaps of which we ourselves are sometimes totally unaware.] ¹³ Keep back Your servant also from presumptuous [sins]; let them not have dominion over me. Then I shall be blameless, and I shall be innocent of great transgression.” (Ps 19.12-13, annotation and emphasis mine.)  If one assumes God is doing something, and say so and/or act upon it, and He is not, one is guilty of great transgression.

[19] “That which was from the beginning, which we have heard, which we have seen with our eyes, which we have looked upon, and our hands have handled, concerning the Word of life— ^2 the life was manifested, and we have seen, and bear witness, and declare to you that eternal life which was with the Father and was manifested to us— ^3 that which we have seen and heard we declare to you, that you also may have fellowship with us; and truly our fellowship [is] with the Father and with His Son Jesus Christ. ^4 And these things we write to you that your joy may be full.”  (1 Jn 1.1-4, emphasis mine)  One cannot have meaningful fellowship unless the parties thereto primarily or foremost have fellowship with Him.  We have substantive fellowship only once we have encountered Him, the Living God.  

[20] Two texts, perhaps worth mentioning in this context, are the following: “Therefore we must give the more earnest heed to the things we have heard, lest we drift away. ^2 For if the word spoken through angels proved steadfast, and every transgression and disobedience received a just reward, ^3 how shall we escape if we neglect so great a salvation [i.e. everything this encompasses], which at the first began to be spoken by the Lord, and was confirmed to us by those who heard [Him,] ^4 God also bearing witness both with signs and wonders, with various miracles, and gifts of the Holy Spirit, according to His own will?  (He 2.1-4, in this case via the spiritual gift of the Holy Spirit referred to by Scripture as “the word of knowledge, see 1 Cor 12.8,) and “For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works [ἔργον in Greek, transliterated as ergon, including out life purpose, found only in Him!], which God prepared beforehand that we should walk in them.”  (Ep 2.10, annotations and emphasis mine)

[21] People who are not secure in God’s love, finding expression of His love in their lives as “fruit of the Holy Spirit,” in my experience, soon try and find perverted “love” elsewhere.  (The fruit God’s Spirit bears in the life of a truly born again believer is, “… love [ἀγάπη in Greek, transliterated agape], joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, ^23 gentleness, self-control. Against such there is no law.^” (Ga 5.22, annotation and emphasis mine.)